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Subscribe for FREE wellness Lauren Muney at age 40:
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Health after the holidays: "Forgive Yourself" So you may have made personal promises for the New Year, like many people who use the calendar as a landmark to begin a new phase of life. "New Year's Resolutions", we call them, and this wasn't a new idea: the Nordic peoples swore oaths in the Yule season, usually while the Yule log was burning (a wooden log thrown into the fire, burning next to the charred remains of last year's log) about the upcoming year.
However, unless you are swearing binding oaths on a boar like those people were, you can feel more at ease about your approaching months of resolutions.
I say, "Bully for you!" Make new directions!! Make that new life! Each day is a day for new possibilities! You are born anew every minute! Take advantage of those new minutes! But not before you understand your old "life". You need to truly assess your old ways before you make new ways -- there's a saying: "Those who forget the past are doomed to repeat it". While this is meant to exemplify social history, it can be taken for any subject at all, including your health and lifestyle. UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU DID WHICH NEEDS RESOLVING; instead of simply saying "I will exercise more", face the hard fact of how often you did (or didn't!) exercise, and use that as a basis of making a new 'resolve' for yourself. What exactly did you do which scuttled your lifestyle or health plans? Did you eat out at fast-food 3 times a week? Did you watch TV 4-6 hours a day? Did you make ice cream a major food group? Until you realize what you have done in the past, you cannot change it for the future. This means we don’t continue doing something because "we have always done them this way", but we are mindful of what we are doing and why, and make appropriate choices from that 'mindfulness'. "Mindfulness" is the state of carefully noticing. We must be mindful of our past behavior so we can mindfully begin the new, healthier, more appropriate behaviors. Now, let's say that you have carefully looked at your past life and you are ready for your new life. There's something important that you need to begin with: FORGIVE YOURSELF.You cannot be superman (or superwoman). Yes, forgive yourself. I meet with clients, friends, and strangers frequently, and recently the first words out of their mouths (because I am a wellness coach and they want to make excuses to me) is, "I did so badly over the holidays. I ate too much, I didn't exercise, and I was too busy . . ." Don't hold yourself under so much guilt for past behaviors, especially during the celebratory holiday times! Those mental "stones" which weighs us down makes us struggle to arise under all that 'load'! Forgive yourself for:
By holding onto guilt, you are creating for yourself this reminder of an "identity" of a failure. That 'identity' does not mean that you cannot observe this past behavior as if it was a bug under a microscope -- if you do not "accept" this identity as "YOU", it cannot stick to you as guilt. You must show yourself unconditional love to grow as a person. Forgiveness of your old behaviors is part of that process. Forgiveness is not "erasure", but acceptance, understanding, and MOVING ON. It's as if you understand that it happened, but you also realize that your life does not have to be entrenched in that old behavior or idea. Realize what feels "value-full" and discard what feels value-less. Making New Year's Resolutions can be a powerful oath to yourself, using the changing of the calendar to mark a significant change in your life. Make the resolutions intelligently, mindfully, and with end results in mind. Oh yeah - final thought: don't be "married" to those specific 'end-result' goals; they may not be what you initially anticipated. You may get halfway there and change tack. You may decide that you don't like aerobics classes and want to try yoga instead. You may decide that you like being in a healthy atmosphere and want to go into the healthcare profession. . . . let everything be a growth experience for you. PROGRESS, NOT PERFECTION. Be mindful of what is happening to yourself: observe, observe, observe! Then start with that clearer picture and move to the next step from there. You have lots of time to seek "perfection" -- whatever that is. (ha).
This is just the beginning of a new life, starting with the "Hallmark holiday" new year!
For more ideas on fitness, health, or "alternative" methods for your lifestyle, contact Lauren for coaching solutions! |
This page is part of Physical Mind
articles: ENJOY! 
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| DISCLAIMER: Any application of the recommendations set forth in this website or in personal consultation is at the reader's discretion and sole risk. The advice and coaching from Physical Mind and Lauren Muney is intended for people in good health. Anyone with medical problems of any nature should see a doctor before starting a diet and exercise program. Even if you have no known health problems, it is advisable to consult your doctor before making major changes in your lifestyle. Any recommendations regarding diet or nutritional treatments should be discussed with your doctor. | ||||||||||||||||||
Last website update:
06/09/2005
Physical Mind Fitness is NOT affiliated with the
PhysicalMind Institute
of Pilates training and certification,
which can be reached at
its own
website.
Making a Resolution means that you are putting down your
past [health, living, & fitness] ways which were not working, and making
new plans. By taking a new path, you are hoping for a new direction and
possibly a new life.